discover your created self

Begin Again {And RJD Link-UP!}


“always we begin again” (from the Rule of St. Benedict)

Remember the former things, those of long ago;
    I am God, and there is no other;
    I am God, and there is none like me.

I make known the end from the beginning,
    from ancient times, what is still to come.
I say, ‘My purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please.’

(Isaiah 46:10-11 NIV)

I just downloaded 1054 photos from my iPhone. After saving them to my computer, I deleted all of them from the phone. It felt good. A fresh start.

I’ve spent the last week taking a vacation from my vacation. Crazy I know, but it’s true. I came home with no agenda staring me down. Not much of anything to do besides unpack, do laundry and decide how I want to spend the month of August.

It’s still summer in my world. (Some people are thinking about school, but I’m past that season.) I pulled out a couple of books from my stack to help guide my pursuits this month. I am on a spiritual quest to spice up my love life with God.

My friend, Lynn Morrissey gave me Spiritual Rhythm for my birthday. In it the author, Mark Buchanan, explains that our souls go through seasons, just like a year. When I pondered which season my soul might be experiencing, I wrote one word in my journal:


Many books have been written about particular seasons of the soul, but what about the “season” when you feel like summer is ending and fall is already beginning. Like when you see a yellow leaf flutter to the verdant ground near the spot you claimed for a day of solitude. Not wanting to let go of life as I have known it, yet not wanting to embrace the new season fully either.

So what will I do while I am between? I will begin again. Empty the album on my iPhone. Dream about the new month ahead. Take time to ponder this in-between season of my soul.

Rent a kayak at our local park and bask in the lingering rays of summer.


Spend a half day journaling and painting at “my” botanical garden.

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Take morning walks looking for inspiration to make art, to create stories, and to enjoy life.


For now, I live in the shadow of certainty . . . that place where seasons transition and God is present.

Linking with Random Journal Day! (I took a lot of liberty this month, no random journal entry, just a post including an honorable mention of my faithful companion and using this post as a means to process life now. Aha! Blog posing as journal! And also doubling as a mini photo album. Tee hee!)

23 responses to “Begin Again {And RJD Link-UP!}”

  1. Kel Loved this one. Reading it as I am driving home from Branson. Actually Josh is driving.

    Did I miss your birthday? When was your birthday? I thought I had it in my phone calendar to send me an alert. I hope I didn’t miss it.

    Branson was amazing. Such a God blessed time. Will fill you in when we meet.

    Love Tracy

    1. lynndmorrissey Avatar

      Traci, for Kel’s birthday: Think Ode to Billy Joe! =] You haven’t missed it for next year. You must tell us about Branson. My husband will not be caught dead in Branson, despite that I keep bugging him to go. I’ll bet a lot of Missourians like me have never been. Glad you had such a nice time.

    2. Tracy…remember Paris in PIedmont! That was my birthday…we ate scrumptious crepes!

  2. I understand that “between” time…seems like we are always “between” seasons in our lives, because even while we are in the middle of one season, we are always looking ahead to the next, and preparing for whatever may be on the new horizon of life. I enjoyed these thoughts today. I am there with you in spirit.

    1. Pamela- It’s so true…between is an apt description for our spiritual state no matter which season of the year or life we face…we are between now and the future, waiting for heaven…oh how I long for our heavenly home some days! It’s great to have you as a kindred spirit here today.

  3. I liked your thoughts on being “between” seasons. That’s exactly where I feel like I am. The nest isn’t quite empty, but the chick is 22 and hardly needing my daily care. I’m staring 50 in the eye as my birthday approaches. The church I’ve been attending just suffered a split. I find myself still needing parts of both “sides.” As I seek the Father’s will and ask to be led to my calling all I seem to find is silence…which I am taking to mean that this is a time for me to study and grow between callings. God is definitely here in this space.

    And hey, if you read my post on Dawn’s blog you know I think blogging can count as journaling.

    1. Staci- I too am almost an empty nester and almost 50…that’s next year for me. Glad to be in the between time together. I read your post at Dawn’s …it inspired me to count this one as journaling today! Ha! Hope to see you around the blogosphere and back next month for RJD!

  4. lynndmorrissey Avatar

    Kel, I love this post for so many reasons . . . because you are back at your blogpost writing, because you write so well, because you are enjoying Spiritual Rhythm (actually I hadn’t intended it for your b/day, but rather as a thank you for your beautiful work at the Hearts on Fire journaling intensive–but I”m glad it feels birthday-ish! :-), for your lovely photos at the Missouri Botanical Garden (we might debate whether or not it is your garden or mine!!), for your capturing the Chihuly “onions” as I call them on the reflecting pond in front of the Climatron–one of my favorite sites!–, for your continual and refreshing transparency, and for identifying your spiritual season (not everyone can or wants to). Actually, I loved reading about BEGINNING here, because this was the theme God gave me for 2014, and with a beginning is often a beginning again. God’s second chances and new beginnings are a part of His gracious nature. There is such depth to the meaning of beginning. Actually, God gives us the opportunity to begin anew each and every day of our lives. I love that. I pray that God gives you a beautiful new beginning as you navigate the inbetween. May you always rest beneath the shadow of His wing.

    1. Lynni- It’s good to be back! Even with this sense of between-ness, I sense God giving me direction to keep blogging, journaling, being me and loving Him with all my heart, soul and mind no matter what season my soul is in! And of course, I’ll share the garden with you 🙂 Thank you again for the book it is just what I need for this season!
      Love and hugs-Kel

      1. lynndmorrissey Avatar

        You know we should “do” the Garden together sometime. We could talk and walk and just sit quietly and journal. I’m so glad you opted for a membership. It is such a beautiful place to spend time with friends and/or the Lover of your soul. So glad you are enjoying the book!! Wonderful. Also, the Lord will speak to you *through* your journaling, remember.:-)

  5. Oh, my – how I adore you! Oh, this is lovely- and letting us jump right into you “rhythm” and season of the moment, well that is pure delight. I love your thoughts on Between, Kel. This is such a whimsical post and …yes, I guess somewhat a journaled entry/post. How can I argue with such, beautiful, inspired thoughts and images. AND WOWSA that’s a lot of images , girl! I am the same way! Happy RJD day…wait til you see my take this month…giggle. I took some liberty myself! Working on it now!

    1. Dawn- I woke up this morning excited for a fresh start and happy that it was RJD day…I started the post several times today and then it just came together…love the freedom we have here to be ourselves! Can’t wait to go visit the other links! Love and blessings-Kel

  6. Ah the rhythm of summer. That’s what I love. The freedom to do whatever, be whatever, let the wind and water (and kayak) take you where it will. Let the words and images take you as well…
    I love to think of us stretching our wings and take flight on the RJDs, not be bound by anything but our God-given, In-His-Image imagination (I will probably grab a journal this month, though…I’m tired tonight).
    PS LOVE that you dumped all those pictures and that you shared a minute portion of them with us!

    1. Carolyn- Yes summer is my favorite rhythm but I am learning to love the other seasons as well and for the first time in a long time I see that summer has it’s bittersweet moments as well. Yes the ease of snapping photos of everything cracks me up…but I like to take photos for possible blog posts and never in a million years would share all of them, but I had fun in the moment capturing an image for possible use. I saved them to computer and must some time in the future weed some out….quite a few actually! Blessings-Kel

  7. lynndmorrissey Avatar

    Kel . . . what is Paris in Piedmont (if you are able to share). Don’t mean to be nosy, but it sounds intriguing, and as you know, I love Par-ee!

    1. It was my birthday getaway with a couple friends and the theme was Paris food and treats…we sat by the Black River and imagined we were in France.

      1. lynndmorrissey Avatar

        Oh I just love that. Pretending is good, especially with friends.

  8. Hey, Kel ‘your’ botanical garden has some floating glass orbs I’m guessing by Dale Chihuly of Tacoma WA……….but you knew that, right? His pieces are in Seattle and Tacoma in public and private places. I’m gonna have to get a shot of his ‘flowers’ in the garden near Seattle Center.
    Anyway……….this was beautiful. ‘Blog posing as journal’ I love it! (And the heart leaf? What a beautiful gift from our Creator!)

    1. Yes the glass orbs are by Chihuly…I would love to see his other works…one summer we had an installation at the botanical gardens and some of his pieces were gifted to the garden. I would love to see what he gifted to Seattle 🙂 Yes the heart leaf…you noticed 🙂
      I am enjoying His creation and His creativity…blessings and hugs!

  9. lynndmorrissey Avatar

    kel, I have some questions:
    Is that Creve Coeur lake?
    Are you sitting in the Sassafras Cafe at the Garden?
    Is the metal bench on the north walk, north of the gravesite, near the caretaker’s house? I have journaled there.
    Sometime, I hope you can visit Shaw’s house, though I am not at all fond of their renovation. I loved it as it was. Ah . . .change. . . She and I are not always companionable.
    Another thought . . . have you ever written about your shadow self or shadow mission? Interesting topic. 🙂

    1. Lynni- Love your questions! Yes Creve Coeur lake on the kayak…a gem in my neighborhood that I often overlook 😦 but love that we can rent kayaks and bikes there now. Yes to both locations at the garden…it was busy and the bench was the quietest place I could find. And the cafe has nice patio furniture to sit in the shade and look out at the reflecting pools with the onions 🙂 I think I have been in the Shaw house…is it on the garden property? Thanks for the writing prompt…I haven’t thought of writing about those topics, but now I am! Talk to you soon…Let’s plan a date for the garden.

  10. lynndmorrissey Avatar

    Would love to “do” the Garden with you . . . in a bit cooler climes. =] Yes, I thought that that was the bench. I’ve loved sitting there myself. Yes, the Shaw House was the country estate of Henry Shaw, and of course, the surrounding gardens were his, which he bequeathed to St. Louis. The house is right behind the gravesite (also a favorite place of mine, all draped in ivy). The other large brick town house, which houses Garden offices, was actually his city townhouse, which his will dictated be dismantled and reconstructed in the Garden after his death. I also love Flower Sunday at Christ Church Cathedral (across from the main city library HQ downtown). One Sunday in April is designated as Flower Sunday, and the altar is strewn with gorgeous flowers from the Garden, as directed in his will. It was his church when he lived in the City of St. Louis.

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About Me

Hi! My name is Kel Rohlf. I am an intuitive mixed-media artist, creative writer and performer. Life is a performance. I often attend.


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